Caugh In The Rain

source: fromme-toyou@tumblr

...is where I long to be.

Chizu & Ryu: Ice Cream Heartbreak

And then

...it got really weird.

So, Tell me

Tell me did you sail across the sun
Did you make it to the Milky Way to see the lights all faded
And that heaven is overrated

Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star
One without a permanent scar
And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there 


Tell me did the wind sweep you off your feet
Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day
And head back to the Milky Way
And tell me, did Venus blow your mind
Was it everything you wanted to find
And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there

Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken
Your best friend always sticking up for you even when I know you're wrong
Can you imagine no first dance, freeze dried romance five-hour phone conversation
The best soy latte that you ever had . . . and me 

No es que muera de amor

Jaime Sabines

de que serviria (?)

Yo sé que no hay amores tan eternos
que el tiempo es un ritual que me destruye
que la distancia va matando sueños
y va cortando el hilo que nos une
Yo se que en esta guerra hay un te quiero
perdiendo su batalla ante el olvido
que la primavera es un infierno
cuando la soledad marca el camino


Pero si volviera se que nada cambiaria
pero si volviera todo se repetiría
Si pudiera hablarte ¿cuanto te diría?.
Porque si volvieras se que no comprenderías
que eras mi equipaje, que eras mi bandera
que no había mejor paisaje que tu cordillera
que eras el viaje a la ultima estrella
y como celaje fuiste borrando la huella
Si pudiera hablarte ¿de que serviría?.

Life is Wonderful Indeed

Today around sunset I stepped out to walk my dog and was just awestruck by the sunset today it was extremely pink with shades of purple and the sky reflected on the lake, it was just beautiful, sadly I didn't had my cellphone with me and couldn't take a picture but maybe that was better because I just stood there amazed by the sight the sky, some geese flying by, the lake, ducks idling in the water, the wind playing with the weeping willow branches, the light changing, the clouds changing like a moving canvas. And for a moment there I didn't felt sad, worried, stressed, not even melancholic I just felt at ease. Just happy to belong. 

Las Caras de la Suerte

"... Su padre le había advertido que en la vida diez mil personas intentarían decirle que hacer, le asegurarían  que ellos tenían la ultima palabra. Pero saber lo que uno realmente quiere, le aconsejo, basta con sentarse a solas en la oscuridad."

Cristina Garcia 

(fragmento)

El Hombre al Piano

Esta es la historia de un sábado, de no importa que mes... 

la la ra la la ra la la ra ...

La Breve y Maravillosa Vida de Oscar Wao

"...Las palabras que le salieron parecían pertenecer a otro, era en buen español, por primera vez. Les dijo que lo que hacian estaba mal, que borraban del mundo un gran amor. Que el amor era algo raro, fácilmente confundido con otro millón de cosas y si alguien sabia que eso era verdad, ese era el. Les hablo de Ybon y de la forma en que la amaba y cuanto habían arriesgado y que habían comenzado a soñar los mismo sueños y a decir las mismas palabras. Les dijo que era solo por ese amor que el había podido hacer lo que había hecho, lo que ellos ya no podían detener, les dijo que si lo mataban era probable que no sintieran nada y era probable que sus hijos no sintieran nada tampoco, que no lo sintieran hasta que fueran viejos y débiles o estuvieran a punto de ser atropellados por un carro, y entonces sentirían que el estaba esperando por ellos del otro lado y allá no seria ningún gordo, ningún comemierda, ningún chiquillo a quien ninguna muchacha jamas amo; allí seria un héroe, un vengador. Porque todo lo que uno puede sonar (subio la mano) lo puede ser."

                                                                                   Junot Diaz

                                                                                  (Fragmento)

ha!

"...Que perfume usas? Y riendo le dije:

                     -Ninguno, ninguno!

Te amo y soy joven, huelo a primavera"

                                              -Juana de Ibarbourou

Of losing hope

on days like today I wonder if putting on my "brave face" is really a good thing? I mean I don't wanna emo out on life but how am I not being a hypocrite? I'm exhausted of my "brave face", of keep my head above water, of holding out the hope that maybe just maybe a breakthrough is around the corner, of waiting for "little longer", and actually discover that I've been waiting for quite a long time and that the fact that better things are just around the corner might not be true at all.

Poetry

...is good for the soul
                               or so they say.

Amor

No, no has muerto, no.
Renaces,
con las rosas en cada primavera.
Como la vida, tienes
tus hojas secas; tienes tu nieve, como
la vida...
Mas tu tierra,
amor, está sembrada
de profundas promesas,
que han de cumplirse aún en el mismo
olvido.
¡En vano es que no quieras!
La brisa dulce torna, un día, al alma;
una noche de estrellas,
bajas, amor, a los sentidos,
casto como la vez primera.
¡Pues eres puro, eres
eterno! A tu presencia,
vuelven por el azul, en blanco bando,
blancas palomas que creíamos muertas...
Abres la sola flor con nuevas hojas...
Doras la inmortal luz con lenguas nuevas...
¡Eres eterno, amor,
como la primavera!


                 Juan Ramon Jimenez

Para que me quieras

Y para que me quieras te daré
Un año entero que te haré sólo de primaveras
y lo prenderé en tu pelo con un alfiler
y para que me quieras... te querré.

Hoy

...estoy por callar. 

Unfailing Love

Don't tear your clothing in your grief, but tear instead you hearts. Return to the Lord your God, for he is merciful & compassionate, slow to get angry & filled with unfailing love. He is eager to relent and not to punish. 

                                                                                Joel 2.13

Walking In The Rain

Walking In The Rain, Tae Park 

Of loss

     We lost our granny today. I don't remember the last time my mom cry as much as she did today, neither I remember the last time I choke back so same tears. I don't dare to say anything to my mom. I want to tell her "It will be Ok", "Life goes on" or something like it but I don't dare. Because I simply have no means to understand her pain. And if I were in her place I would be offended if someone were to say such things. I guess that's the irony of it all. One loses a loved one, someone that means the world to us, someone who is our life, who is our world but life just goes on. People just say "I'm sorry" or that they feel our pain yet their life goes on, the same as yesterday and the day before that. But when the world becomes empty and obsolete, the last fucking thing you wanna hear is that life goes fucking on (even if indeed it does). I'm not making any sense that I know but right now I just hurt; for my mom and because I lost my granny today. I JUST HURT. 

What You Won't Do For Love

"only you made do for love what I would not do"

Sink or Swim (?)

     It's in my very nature to always, always swim never sink, never give up, to always keep striving forward even if it is at a snail pace, to never stop, to not accept defeat and keep on conquering whatever life throws at me. But lately I feel like I don't wanna swim anymore, I don't wanna fight anymore. I just want to let go and sink. Who knows maybe there's stillness, and calm at the bottom. Maybe peace of mind. In all honesty I'm exhausted. And letting go and sinking might not be so bad after all.

srce:weheartit.com 

Oh Heartbreak!

crdts: mangoscans

My heart is breaking for my Ryu but al least the cat is finally out of the bag. Oh my sweet Ryu is so heartbreakingly sad how he knew that Chizu has always looked at him as a friend and nothing. He was so calm and collected through it all yet he was speaking with his heart on his sleeve. I'm tempted to wanting to slap the beejesus out of Chizu so that she would react and come to realize how amazing my Ryu is but I understand where she is coming from. I'm so frustrated right now :-( I want my Ryu to be happy.

Unwritten

"...Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten.
Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find
Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it..."

I Miss My Grandma

     On a day like today, in this very moment I would like to rest my head on my grandma's (my dad's mom) knees and tell her to pat my head. I just want to feel her hands brushing through hair and giving me this sense of calm that only she can give me. But 1. she lives over 3,000 miles away from me and 2. even of I were to be in front of her I would never say "grandma pat my head" o would I lay my head in her knees and if she were to take the initiative and try to do either or both I would freak the f out and wouldn't allow her. Why? because that just how I am. I don't feel comfortable with such displays of physical interactions. Even if it is what my soul longs for, in practice I would feel so uncomfortable that I wouldn't be able to bear it. 

     Yet I miss her, she has this thing to her that is so solemn. She barely ever raises her voice yet her strong character is reflected in her being, she is like a column to me a big, tall, beautiful column. Talking to her, seeing her brings me peace, it gives me a sense of ease. She who has been through a lot in her life has this quality to make storms seem like drizzle, she is so honest it hurts but she is never cruel. And she loves me so much it brings me to tears. Any who I miss her, I miss her, I miss her!. I even miss her hot chocolate that I always refused to drink, I miss how she smelled like vick's vapor rub in the evenings, and the smell of her morning tea.

My grams celebrating her bday in India, because that how she rolls :D 

My New Background ;)

credit to owner @tumblr

A Drawing of GD & TOP baby looks so freaking handsome :)
Thanks to whoever drew this. 

Let The Rain Come Dowm

Does this place exists? If so someone please tell me where. This is where I want to be right now sitting or maybe lying down on that bench feeling how little by little all the droplets hit my skin until I'm soaking wet. This is where I long to be in this quiet, secluded place, by myself, so that maybe just maybe I can put some order to my toughs and the rain can wash away all that's troubling me. Maybe in this place I'd feel free to cry a little, laugh a little, scream and even dance with nothing but the rain as my witness. 

"I want to let the rain come down

Make a brand new ground

Let the rain come down tonight"

S.Bareilles 

It's Raining

google.com/images 

I'm Not Ok

...pero no hay mal que dure mil años (ni cuerpo que lo resista). 

  somethings gotta give

Libertad del Alma

Yo quiero ser como las aves que no pueden atraparse ni alcanzarse.

Incubus LIve Sessions IV

Oil & Water

You and I are like oil and water
And we've been trying, trying, trying
... to mix it up.

We've been dancing on a volcano
And we've been crying, crying, crying
Over blackened soles

Babe, this wouldn’t be the first time
It will not be the last time
There is no parasol that could shelter this weather

On A Side Note

This is how my desktop looks after 3 days of watching Incubus live hahah is like I want to capture their every breath, two more days to go and its over I'm actually dreading the end of these concerts =(  

Incubus Live Sessions III

...needless to say I cried again, I just love them.