I'm Tired

     I'm really tired of: "you don't call me", "you don't stay in touch", "how is it that you're flying in on friday and I didn't know?", "I'm mad at you because I never hear from you" & other exclamations starting with I, I'm,etc. Those type of remark infuriate me beyond my limits yet at the same time I'm too tired to even get confrontational.

     Are you upset because I don't call you? Why don't you try asking for my number and you give me a call when you feel like you need to stay in touch? How's that for a change?! I mean relationships need to be a two way street why does it have to be me the one ALWAYS calling and reaching. I'm going out of my freaking means to just that reach out! Because yes i miss you all but I also have a daily routine that takes a toll on me. I work and go to school full time pursuing a double major and a minor, and if there's something I lack is freaking time trust me! 

     Yes I'm the one who left, yes I'm the one in the States but yes it also costs me money to call overseas sometimes I can only call to say hello or something like that and cannot chat-a-thon as I would like, you feel like I'm neglecting in any shape or form? Just let me know BUT do so nicely do not give attitude and do not try to make me feel like I should just go and kill myself because I'm being a bad friend/ sibling. That shit ain't gonna fly. I'm trying not to get confrontational because we are family/ friends but one can only take so much you know? So I guess I will have to find the time to call each and everyone of you that is doing this and call you out on it so that we can move on to greener pastures; Because I feel like I'm being bully by most of you and like I said before mama don't play that game. I'm tired, tired, tired, really tired, oh so tired of this. 

Sincerely,

Nia

PS: Yes this was a rant!